Monday, September 15, 2008


Hello All! I am happy to say that the results are in!!! And they showed that it was something that could be cleared up! Praise God!! So our plan now is to finish up the antibiotic and finish up our cycle. I hope everything works out. I am trying daily to keep this positive attitude up!!
I know this is kind of short but I just wanted to update you guys.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Theapy sessions ONLINE!!!

Yes I know that this is my second post today but I wanted to comment back to all the comments on my last couple of posts.

This blog has been such a blessing! It has been a form of therapy to type my thoughts out and get them OUT of my head. And I have been able to share my story with others just as I get to hear other's stories who are going through the same thing. I am glad that I am able to share my story with all of you. And I love the support that I get from all of you. There is just something about talking with people who know EXACTLY what we are going through!!!

If you ever have any questions or ever need to talk please email me !!! Thank you for all of your kind thoughts and sharing your stories with me!

Hopefully I will be able to share some more news with you ASAP!


So I know that this post is about four days late! But I was trying to hold out until tommorrow when we will have real results. Then I thought maybe I can just update everybody up to the point where we are right now.

Well as you know this past Monday I had my monthly ultrasound, and William was getting tested. As you know this was an EXTREMELY awkward experience for not just him but for me as well, but we decided to walk in confident hand in hand, thinking that no matter what happens God will help us get throught it. This appointment had to of been the most stressful up to this point. My thinking was that if William ended up being ok then that is GREAT, but if there was something wrong, at least we know.

So this is how the appointment went... The nurse called me back for my ultrasound and took William where he needed to go, so I had to sit in the ultrasound room all by myself for what felt an ETERNITY!!! Til William finally joined me and of course as soon as he came in I drilled him with questions!! Then the Dr. came in and did our monthly ritual. Things looked good this was our 4th month of ovulating in a row. I proceeded to ask the following questions after he was done:
-So what is our plan (meaning how many more months am I allowed to be on Clomid)?
Dr: You will take Clomid about 3 more times permitting that you continue to ovulate.

-What happens next after we can't take Clomid anymore?
Dr: Once we are done with Clomid we will move on to shots which is a more aggressive method.

-Do you think there is something wrong with William?
Dr: No I don't think so, sometimes Clomid helps and then other times after taking it for long periods of time it makes your uterus a not so good place for an egg to nest.

Once I asked all of my questions the Dr. then asked us if we had had William tested, we proceeded to tell him that we had JUST done it! He then asked us if we could wait around for about an hour becuase some of the results will be ready. He told us to go sit back out in the waiting room and either the nurse would come if things looked good, or he would come out if there was something wrong. After he left the room I just kind of lost it a little bit, I just sat there and cried. I wondered how did we get to this point. I told William I am so SCARED of the shots, I HATE needles!!!!! But I finally composed myself and we headed out to the waiting room.

So we tried to be calm and focus on the blessing that we would be able to get some of the results back so soon. We waited about 30-45 minutes and then the door finally opened and it was the Dr. a lump began to form in my throat thinking all the horrible things it could be, but I decided that it could be something small.

So of course both of our minds were racing as we followed the Dr. into a small room we had never been in before. He started out on a positive, William's count was really GOOD. So I was thanking God for that. But then he proceeded to tell us that there was something up and there were a few ways things could go. If this little issue could be cleared up by the prescription the Dr. wrote him we could continue on our merry way. If it does not clear up in 3 weeks on the prescription then he has to go see a special Dr. And lastly if the rest of the test results say it is something that can't be fixed then he would incorporate an IUI. So as you can imagine we have been praying for patience this whole week trying to wait to get the rest of the results, we are hoping we will get them tomorrow.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

Sometimes you have to find a way to see the rest of the milk in the glass.

Well I am sorry to say that around 11:30AM this morning Aunt Flow came and paid me a visit. So it is very clear that I am NOT pregnant ( I don't know what it is but when I say that phrase I always feel like I am one MAURY SHOW, "And William is NOT the father!") Yeah yeah I know not funny!!! Anyways I am proud to say that despite my disappointment, I am very glad that my pd. came as opposed to me taking a test and getting a negative result. I hate taking pregnancy tests. I just get so much anxiety, it's like I know it is going to be negative, but I still secretly hope that it will be positive. So I thank God that he was gracious enough to have my pd. come when it did. So I did not have to take a pregnancy test.

Unfortunately its arrival has sent a certain things into motion. The first is I obviously need to go get an ultrasound done on Monday. Fun, Fun! And well another serious thing must happen. You see these past few months William, Dr. W. ,and I having discussing William getting tested. Well this month was the cut off point, both William & I decided if I did not get pregnant this month we would get him tested. So guess what he has to do on Monday!!! And I am sure that all of you reading this have gone through this either in my shoes or William's. I feel so bad! But I know it has to be done. I know this has to be so hard for William, and it means the world to me that he would do this despite how uncomfortable and awkward it will be. I just love him so much and I thank God for him EVERY day!! There is no one more perfect for me, that could be there for me during this difficult time. He is truly amazing! Any way if anyone has some words of wisdom for us about what is coming ahead of us, please share!

And as usual thank you so much for all the kind thoughts and check-ins. I love my blog family!